i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
i just met a girl who was sent to the hospital for using her phone as a vibrator and got electrocuted. 4 weeks later she got sent back for shoving a hot dog up there. welcome to the teenage american society
We can get Dustin to help us. I think he'd be good at luring girls into a dark alley.
I just heard a girl in all seriousness say, "I told him I'm not a stalker. I just really really want to talk to him."
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
God, i just love slightly insecure guys with hearts of gold and giant penises.
So my ex just cheated on her current bf w/me and now there's a car coming to take me to Vegas... Is this really my Thursday night?
I hate you.
We've been here 3 hours and the only 1 word answer she didn't give was the drink order. Don't think I'm getting laid tonight
It's official. Hawaii is 100% better when you're stoned.
She started crying and told me to leave half way through, I'm walking down main with a bottle of patron and a sweatpants boner.
this better not be you asking for a beej
I know he'd never cheat on me. It'd be like choosing Mexican tap water over Patron.
You're like Jane Goodall in a forest of gay men. Someday your autobiography will be called "Bottoms in the Mist".
I just wish I had a snapshot of his attempted front flip off the bar. There are some things that are worth getting a life ban for, and the moment of impact with his foot and that lady's face was one of those things.
Happy 4th. Did you guys get your syphilis thing taken care of?
i cant hook up i'm covered in egg rolls
Randomize
