Im wearin a dollar bill hat and tgkin a big girl home. Lifi is gmwnd
Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
you were so high you were expressing yourself in action figures
Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
I bought a goldfish, named it after my ex-girlfriend, and let it die. It's really the little things in life.
You're earring is so big in my mouth
Just FYI, I'm breaking up with my boyfriend tonight and you need to be on call to be my first rebound bang
It's hard to be judgmental of others when you are wearing silver pleather.
I said to him "i can't have sex with anyone in my friend's living room" then he said "we can move the air mattress into the kitchen"
Dude, she got "I party too much" skinny. She looks like a recovering drug addict.
strip vodka pong is never a good idea. I saw into his colon when he picked up the ball off the floor
Until you have had Country Grammar stuck in your head whilst writing a Supreme Court brief you've never lived.
BILL GATES DONALD TRUMP LET ME IN NOW
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed...
Did you poop on the roof?
WTH?
Is that a no?
Thank god you don't know my other address I'm safe for now
Awww you know you would like it if I found u
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