I had so many friends before that round of Never Have I Ever.
she uses ice cubes and hums anything I want. Last night was Welcome to the jungle. it wasnt lost on me shes a puma. no shame in that 30+ game.
his penis was crooked so i rode him at an angle. he seemed used to this.
Girl in front of me has spent the class alternating between playing farmville and the tiffany's website looking at engagement rings. Every once in a while she holds her hand up to the screen.
She doesn't deserve the breathe the same air that we do.
She just bought a cow and we've moved on to looking at wedding dresses.
I got a job at a micro-brewery. Now who made the bigger mistake, them or me?
I'm actually agreeing with glenn beck. What the FUCK was in that margarita?!
would he be offended if i told him that "national coming out day" is october 11. thats subtle enough right?
So i was told that i peed in the sink, had sex with a pillow and banged on a washer while singing idian chants
my mouth is as dry as a post-menopausal camel on antidepressant's vagina.
Seriously. My vagina. Can we talk about it? It's gonna jump off this treadmill and devour my trainer.
Thanks for letting me rent out your vagina rec room. I don't expect the security deposit back.
you start one little fire by the lake and the police want to talk to you all night...
I'm serenading his dick with my words. I understand how poets get inspiration now.
Looks like a sea otter shaved my vagina. Keep an eye out for me this weekend, no one can see this.
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
Randomize
