I may have been to starbucks and 2 classes with balls still written on my face...
I just got fire extinguished by his roommate while we were having sex. That's just taking cock blocking to a whole new level.
And then he used the flashlight app to illuminate me giving him head. Thanks IPhone
i was quietly enjoying my waffles when he came downstairs naked, kissed me on the forehead, and thanked me for the night before. i didnt even know anyone stayed over.
Look, we all have our slutty phases. Mine is just forever.
I am never taking advice from you again. The high heels in the shower were a bad idea. I orgasmed and almost drowned.
4 girls bringing me taco bell. this is what dreams are made of.
Drunbk and roasting marshmallows on my stove. Accidentally singed the catr's fur but she'sd alright.
The trainer from the tech college told me that I would pass the first aid course so long as I turned up sober. Challenge accepted
Well since your going through her phone..look man she loves you..she just loves my dick more
No you don't understand. This tree is really alive. Like in Pocahontas.
You said you liked how I put the cream cheese on.
Know we haven't talked but having an orgy party on the 20th if you're interested. If not, disregard this text.
Who is this?
One of the worst parts about living at my parents again is trying to hide how often I'm hungover, just quietly puked in the basement bathroom while my mom got ready for work
I just volunteered myself to get tazed this should get interesting
Randomize
