How come twittering sounds sexual?
Because of Bambi.
whatcha mean you cant get rid of genital warts? thats not what my girlfriend says
Draw a picture of yourself puking and peeing on her and give it to her with a note that sys this could be your future if you be my friend
Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
I'm wearing this super skanky ass dress that's wayyy to slutty for church but I think Jesus will appreciate it because i look so bangin for his bday.
Banged a lazy eyed chick last night. It was like fucking an iguana.
I'm the only kid serving jury duty. And I'm the only one who may walk out of here in handcuffs for a warrant. I'm enabling these people to doubt America's youth once again.
Also I climbed atop a mailbox with a toilet paper hat and a wolverine claw made of glowsticks, screaming at passers-by that they were going to die. Control me
Note to self glow in the dark nail polish can be quite the mood killer during sex especially when you notice its working for the first time and you stop everything your doing to do spirit fingers
you two really need to work out your issues. my vagina can't handle another week of your pent up frustrations.
I came in your room, you looked at me and said "I fucked up" and then some kid showed up and took you to the hospital
Dude. All those hangovers I never had came back with a vengeance. I just opened the door of this car to barf. The car was not motionless. We are on the autobahn.
after we were done she whispered to my dick "you sir, are a genius"
I guess all those years with her as your babysitter finally paid off.
You told me "I need to pound this drinks if I'm going to pretend his dick is big enough" then left. Dollar night quotes 2012
i just want a position where we can lock up like some sort of sexual megatron and go the whole night that way
Randomize