Christians are straight up FREAKS
don't go back without me... they'll know i'm pooping.
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
I just sneezed cum. He better have a damn good day at work.
My vagina just recognized that song.
You said you couldnt get the condom on but "its the thought that counts"
On a side note I think I burnt my eyebrow when we "teter-totered" into the fire
The really sad thing is that I actually practiced crawling in my room yesterday in preparation for today
WHY IS EVERY MAN IN THIS CITY GAY? IS IT SO BAD TO WANT TO BE TREATED LIKE A PIECE OF SHIT BY A REALLY HOT STRAIGHT MAN FOR A NIGHT?
Most sexually ambiguous night of my life. Kept switching from the NBA finals to the Tonys.
Just woke up to find myself in a random bed with two people next to me having sex. I thought it would be awkward to just suddenly get up so i think I'm gonna lie here and pretend I'm still sleeping.
I just don't know the best way to tell him I think I saw him in a porn. I mean I got off to it, isn't there some level of awkwardness there?
Can I come over? I respect you, but I want disrespectful things to happen
Well he offered to lick my asshole so...I'm not really worried about his interest level.
God doesn't care if you're a paramedic, you can't do that to someones cat and still get into heaven
Randomize
