She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
too bad being hungover isnt a job. just threw up from 9am to 5pm
At what point should shame kick in? Realising I had a one night stand with a man engaged or realising I am that man's wedding photographer?
Apparently I had an idea for a cooking show and then proceeded to throw cookies at people.
I beat my mom's friend's boyfriend in a vodka chugging competition. Our generation FTW.
I called him and he said hell call me back hes in the middle of his kareokee song he was out by himself and his dog
Shouldn't have fucked on the top bunk, I bounced so high my hair got caught in the ceiling fan and almost broke my neck.
He visits one Denver strip club and now hes moving there
God he's so convenient, drugs, an parties all in one person. He's like the Walmart of delinquency.
I spent a lot of time in their kitchen cause I was convinced that the living room was gonna fall... Sorry for not warning you about that.
I took the pregnancy test for shits and giggles, but neither shits nor giggles were had.
You blew him?!?!
*Am blowing
And I keep taking breaks to write you back, please stop replying.
She shoved her hand down my pants and held my cock for thirty minutes in the bar. It was like she was letting all the other females know I was hers.
Help me help you realize you are a moron
I just wiped my butthole and there was glitter down there.
Randomize