So we were in the middle of hooking up when he stopped me. I thought he was having a moral dilemma about the whole having a girlfriend thing. But no. He got down on all fours, butt naked, and started throwing up and farting simultaneously. I took it as my cue to leave.
no really all good couples have similar hair colors!
Using pokemon references during sexual acts is always a good idea.
i bought a pregnancy test with dimes. Is that trashy?
I couldn't accept the bj. My penis has done nothing wrong and didn't deserve the punishment of her face.
The djing cat is back again. I think he just makes appearances when im shit drunk just to fuck with my mind.
He honestly told me my belt was "supercute" when we started hooking up. I would be the girl to find the only straight man in the world that uses the word "supercute".
the best thing about long term relationship is that the fact that i bothered to shave my legs today counts as a valentines gift
Moment of the night: you were impatient while I paid for the tequila shots and proceeded to lick and salt MY hand for me. This is why we're roommates.
Question. Was fucking Laura an entirely regrettable decision?
like...quickly.
Yea I almost drowned giving a BJ in the shower once
I may not be his cup of tea, but I bet I'm his 10th shot of tequila
I seriously doubt I'm gonna be able to properly put your dick in my mouth whilst upside down, but I'm willing to give it my best shot
With great boredom comes great irresponsibility.
Please tell me you're not on their roof again..
Nice people suck dick too. I'm proof.
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