He has such a weird drunk-voice.
dude, he's deaf.
I did something stupid with eggs call me when you get up. Cops were also involved.
I think drunk me is telling hungover me something... I just have to crack the code.
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
The drunk teletubby stumbling out of the place tipped me off..
She said she couldn't find my penis because my arm was in the way. That was my penis
Every man deserves at least one moment like that
Easy Mac is falling out of my sweatshirt as I'm walking down the street.
I can't look at him without thinking about his cum face
I remember nothing of last night, but I did manage to figure out which frats I went to by the trails of straw across campus.
Don't forget: you only show your tits for the good beads. Be judicious.
It's like a squid of pain has attached to my head and it spreading it's whorey tentacles all over.
I shaved my legs and got a bikini wax, I don't care what I take home as long as it has a penis
I just wrote a love letter to my weed and texted it to my cousin. I can't say it any differently. It happened.
Is this what it's like to be an adult? You plan out play dates for your vagina?
He asked me to come stay with him so he could "see that ass and watch Harry Potter."
Randomize
