Not a fireman, but good enough for last night.
halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
I'm not inviting you over anymore if my cat keeps ending up in the freezer...
I dreamt I won the Huge Cock Championship last night. It was glorious.
I positioned my bed perfectly so around 10 a.m. every morning there are rays of sunshine coming through the window in my room. Now i can tan while PTFO.
I am moving slowly w him. I havent even masturbated to him yet.
peeing off your aunts pourch into the koy pond seemed like a good idea at the time
I mean I drunk but not enough to handle a Scientology convention
You're just mad that I don't wanna have dugout sex with you
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
Did you make me take pictures of your ass last night because you fucked on some wet paint or did i dream that?
YOU TRIED TO SWIM IN HER FISHTANK. I don't think she's going to call you.
Also topless tea is a thing that happens in our apartment. Ready yourself.
No, not if I told them not to. they listen to me. I have a vagina.
Listen, I just paid for a hotel room, so I didn't have to have sex in his car. I'm adulting successfully.
Randomize
