I feel like ignoring a facebook event is a lot like a pocket-veto. The only difference is instead of opposing legislation, I don't want to go to your sketchy party.
dude if Megan calls say you Sis was house sitting for me yesterday , she f'n found dana's panties
video games are the ultimate cock blocker
smoking weed is really the only logical conclusion to hangovers
The only thing I really remember is repeating "I hope I still have a job on Monday". Oh and pulling my boob out of my dress.
So I take it the company Christmas dinner went well then...
he thinks the dog can do a keg stand. i will let you know how it turns out
Is it possible to have pulled a muscle in my neck from passing out with my head in a bucket?
Wtf man. I knew she was bad news. No sane person cares if you eat their raviolli.
This guy is trying to get me to do some acrobatic gymnast shit just so he can see "my tight hole." I'm too big to be sweating in my own damn bed. Shittttt.
And then I fed you egg rolls in bed as you were screaming I'm moving out
Taking care of a girl who just peed on my floor so tonight is not a good night for sex
Well, I wish you luck on finding out who your boyfriend is
COME TO THE TOP OF THE MOUNTAIN AND I WILL GIVE YOU MY SAGE ADVICE.
Election Day 2016 shall forever live in infamy as the day when I hobbled through my neighborhood, mascara melting down my face, wearing one slipper and a cast, blood and cum all over my skirt, carrying a box of wine, and no one even noticed.
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
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