I got to see an enormous amount of vagina this morning.
some dude is getting blown right outside the bar in his car. reeediculous
class
he's dribbling her head like he's fucking allen iverson
you should probably quit with the whole "no homo" thing, especially when you are drunk, "mo homo"gives the wrong impression.
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
She celebrated a negative pregnancy test by going out to Quizno's. I really don't understand her at all.
She used the introduce me to her roommates so she could find out my name trick the next morning..I may be in love.
did anyone else see me puking into my coat sleeve?
You gave the cab driver your pants as collateral while you ran in the house for money.
Hundreds of bug bites..Dad jokingly says "looks like you passed out naked in the woods somewhere"
He may only be 25% black, but after that sexual experience I am 100% never going back.
That feels better than graduating college or that time I tried to ride a llama. Did you know they really spit?
Is she okay?
She may want to issue revenge punches, but medically fine.
Don't wake me up to tell me to cook for you because you don't like taco meat.
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
I wish I were single again so I could actually have sex.
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