I'm going to appeal my grade. Is it better to look studious or slutty?
he put a lighter in my cleavage and said "you're like another pocket!"
Yea...coming from the girl who didn't understand why m&ms and tequila wasn't a "suitable diet"
Is it possible to have pulled a muscle in my neck from passing out with my head in a bucket?
He was having a "party in the princess castle." At what point do I blindfold him and take him to AA?
I did what any insensitive guy would do bought her friends shots and tried to fuck them
It was like a Thanksgiving meal, which you spend 8 hours cooking, and the family wolfs down in 20 minutes. All that flirting and build-up for like 90 seconds of pumping and he was gone in a flash, never to be heard from again.
I've realized that I'm going to have to wake and bake every morning to make it through the summer without killing someone. This is ridiculous.
'TWAS BUT A GLORIOUS SIGHT. BITCHES.
I really want some funfetti cake but I feel like its more socially acceptable to go out and drink
I told you that you should stop drinking and you responded "Thanks for telling me how to live, North Korea!"
Election Day 2016 shall forever live in infamy as the day when I hobbled through my neighborhood, mascara melting down my face, wearing one slipper and a cast, blood and cum all over my skirt, carrying a box of wine, and no one even noticed.
Well I've decided to refuse to conform to society and be naked the rest of the day.
Got caught up in a real life love triangle. Both guys wanted me. I'm tempted to just run off with the cute girl from McDonalds instead
Please do that
It's fucking 2020, I should be able to watch Netflix in the buff while making brownies without you getting preachy about it.
Randomize
