he's afraid if he sleeps with me i'll go all lavender brown on him
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
I just got eleven picture messages of my dick and balls hanging out of my shorts last night. I guess it really is summer when the fratastic, man-thigh exposing shorts come out...
Bro i heard that. I've seen so many balls this month its like march madness all over again
I have glow sticks stuck to my boobs and a missed call from the 911. I'd say last night was a success.
He fell on top of me at a party. I slept with him a week later. We've been fucking for 2 moths. Most successful relationship ever.
We need to step up our tailgating...they're here drinking out of a prosthetic leg
After seeing all of the pics during the trial, all I could think was "her vagina doesn't look THAT dangerous"
Of all the things that can be stripped of me i'll be damned if it's my vanity
I SHIT YOU NOT a mailman helped me leave without waking him up.
Dying on my bathroom floor at 7 am, I would rather be eaten by a shark right now
How long is enough time to schedule homosexual exploration... Like an hour?
I'm going to get old and fat one day... probably pretty soon and I'm not going to have any pictures to show to my cats of what I once looked like.
I just bought a 1/4 oz of pot from a coworker who's old enough to be my grandfather...I'm never leaving Portland.
It feels like the devil is humping my brain with his razor sharp erection.
why yes, bad decisions will be made starting at 3PM Thurs through 8PM on Sun. You have been warned. Plan accordingly.
Randomize
