Your brother just successfully got half the bar mostly naked
I told her i was enlisting in the air force tomorrow.....it was like the activation code to her vagina
I hope as the only other living being in this apartment you can explain to me why the toilet was full of cheerios this morning.
obviously my correlation between being a pro surfer and being extremely good in bed was 100% wrong.
Weird question, would you want to do fetish porn? you get paid.
His penis is literally smaller than my cell phone. I can't go out like that.
And all I wanted you to do is stand there and sing who let the dogs out.
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
I attempted to stand up and was quickly reminded by gravity that I am the universe's bitch right now
My head is pounding and I need an ice pack for my vag. Successful friendsgiving!
Just woke up and spent the first hour of consciousness throwing up with the Rocky theme song on repeat.
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
Whoever put the life size cut out of Snoop Dog next to me in bed understands me.
My professor just paused class to answer a phone call from her dog. Im taking shots before this class from now on.
And speaking of good acting I may have a sex tape now
Randomize
