...so i touched it.
Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
i just googled "what is oprah really like?" how do YOU think my night is going?
well, someone with very low standards is getting their dick sucked
its not that he announces that he can deep throat a banana its the fact he knows he can and it makes me wonder how he found out
This is absurd. I need a man. Or even a moderately-clean hobo will do at this point.
The guy in the cast riped the tap off the keg and hit steve with it
In one night, this kid threw a firecracker under a fucking cop car, crashed three seperate parties, and passed out in a tree in our backyard. Do you even know who he is?
This text is addressed to sober me: getting drunk by yourself may have seemed like a Good idea at first bit it can tell you that it wasn't ad fun as you thought it would be
Ps your lap top bag is FULL of empty beets
Recently successful and happy relationships are at an all time high now that you are no longer fucking so many peoples girlfriends. You alone have changed the mating patterns in the lower half of our county.
You need to stop relating my life to your schoolwork. But tell my girlfriend that she'd be proud.
I've carried my liver for over 24 years. If it can't carry me for the next 24 hours than it deserves to be damaged.
You straddled the banister and fell down the stairs, then proceeded to crawl back up them, I think you need to lay down
I DONT UNDERSTAND NIPPLES. THEY JUST POP OUT FOR NO REASON
Well somebody's had a rough day, nipple-wise
Just set out 2 water bottles as an offering to my hungover self.
What the hell kind of sad excuse for a bottom are you
Randomize
