You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
Covered in glitter and dick. 2010 feels a lot like 2009.
after I pulled back my foreskin she said, "cool like a transformer". I really like her now.
Just wandered into a surprise final. Only a surprise for me though. I wish I could say this is the first time this has happened.
Im pretty sure it started going awry when I asked their mom "How much would it cost me to sleep with your daughters"
it was good sex until i became a rubber doll and he became a jack hammer, so i guess overall it was good
Well I can cross being naked in a minivan off the list
My dad handed me a drink and said, "This'll knock your dick in the dirt..."
I just realized I'm currently not eating carbs, drinking alcohol or having sex. 2014 is off to a horrible start.
He facetimed with his son when he was still inside of me. If that's not a dedicated dad I don't know what is
I'm twenty nine years old, now is not the time to start trying new drugs. I need a hedge fund...not another drug-induced hangover.
He doesn't wear a seatbelt. He votes Republican. He has a small dick. That house of cards just fell apart.
I couldn't have possibly been that bad
You had her flip the penny over to the lucky side before you picked it up and ate it...
We were high and the scary movies were scaring us too bad. Were all watching porn instead now
i need to get crying drunk at the bar more often. i end up going home with guys who have big penises. its like God is saying "there, there, this will cheer you up".
Randomize
