i just saw someone crawling up the stairs to the dorm while screaming "i have the best vagina!"
this girl is having heart failure because she lost her feather...a gypsy blessed it in turkey. Not sure im high enough for this
I can't think of anything besides pubic hair fallout. Ugh.
I just want uncharted vagina. Fresh and ripe.
I think god is proud of me so he is rewarding me in discounted wine
I just remembered you had me meet your law professor while I was wasted...how'd that go?
Is buying her a loofah for my house commitment like? I don't wanna give the wrong idea
Very impressive. My GPA is the same amount of orgasms I can offer tonight (valid only tonight): 3.5
Can't. Busy recovering from the worst pulled muscle of my life that I got either from excessively acrobatic boning or carrying a huge fucking ice luge down the street while wearing 4 inch heels
Send me another check for the tickets. I scratched out "anal wax" and now the bank won't take it.
I WOKE UP IN A FUCKING DOG BED HOW DO YOU THINK I FEEL
They sleep with other people as long as there is no oral. Logic and reason were thrown out the window a long time ago with them.
You tried paying your tab with the coaster
I think one make out session at a bar per year is probably the best choice.
I don’t know if I’m nauseous or just disgusted with myself.
Randomize
