So he said if we had sex he'd take me to Build A Bear. My virginity is so worth a trip to build a bear.
You're 20.
IT'S BUILD A BEAR!
Using pokemon references during sexual acts is always a good idea.
you wouldn't stop saying "oil can" in the tin man voice until I gave you back your flask
Once again there IS no outside bathroom. Never has been, that is the balcony
According to the stories I've heard I decided I was a stuntman after my 6th shot of Jack
We fucked in my basement while hiding from the cops.. And now his Facebook picture is him and others holding up there MIP's in front of my house.. I feel obligated to add him as a friend.
I think I sprained my soul last night
YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL.
Woke up this morning with a darth vader helmet and a bath robe on with my toenails shitly painted
I love you but I don't want to see you naked.
She left you responsible for her guinea pig for what, 3 hours? And it somehow died under your care? I will no longer trust you with so much as a beer.
so hungover i had to get off the train to puke, rallied and went to work. not sure if that's an adulting win or fail
Let's do something tonight. I feel like setting things on fire.
momentary stint on a second floor library computer...guy next to me snorted blue adderall off his notebook through a cut straw, i cant tell if this guy is my hero or just plain crazy...
So what if is hockey, you don’t turn down sex with a professional athlete. They work out all day and have amazing stamina. Your vagina will thank you!
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