im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
the quote on the bathroom wall was "stop reading this and focus on peeing" and i realized i'd peed on the seat.
Literally like 10 people walking in my building talking about how much they hate draco
I'm so turned on right now it's fucking stupid. I hate burger king commercials
My parking ticket this morning was 30bucks. I feel like I'm paying the city to fuck you.
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
I just got a Community College debit card in the mail. My failure has been materialized.
We did Irish Car Bombs out of butter trays, the influence of the retired community is astounding- I didn't know people even owned more than one butter tray.
You think I'll get the "I used to stick it to your daughter" discount?
I drank so much that my feet don't feel like my feet
I think he's only dating me for my ass...
I don't WANT a sex disease! Especially one assigned to me by my supervisor..
its so awesome dude, its like im a magical unicorn or something
Who else has a jello penis in their fridge?!
On the plus side, he ate me out and gave me an orgasm. But he also talked about robots during sex and mispronounced it like the dad in the goldbergs and called them “robits”
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