well there was some sort of sex marathon going on in my house last night..jess and i vs my parents...and im ashamed to say that we lost and my parents out-sexed us
literally followed a trail of condoms to the bus stop this morning. Ahh modern-day bread crumbs
you went up to their shower, tripped in it, accidentally turned it on and then claimed that you like to "test everyone's showers"
i just shit on the floor of my room. my roommate was in the bathroom, my choices were limited.
Just waterfalled in the movie theatre... this is the beginning to a good night
We need somewhere to take these girls. Otherwise it's a orgy in the Mazda.
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
She made me be the little spoon then she pretended to be a jet pack for an hour straight
Congrats. You are not detrimental enough to my psyche to be discussed during this mornings therapy appointment. Please follow up next week to see if you made the cut.
Having my alarm go off at 3:30 makes me wanna rip my dick off and shove it through my eye socket
It looks like I colored my belly button red at some point
well he somehow got his hand stuck in some bike spokes trying to reach for a blunt he dropped and that's NOT the reason he's in the hospital...?
A fair warning: I don't think a cop will let you off the hook just because your birthday is on New Year's Eve
My mom has a bong in her bathroom, but no air freshener.
No instead we fucked in the elevator.. it was wrong on so many levels..
How tall was the building? Maybe it was only wrong on some of them
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