Texts From Last Night · somekindawizard's Favorites

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somekindawizard's Favorites Texts:

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(815): View more from Illinois

Whatever. We're stealing a penguin. Your not allowed near him... You did this to yourself.

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(706): View more from Georgia

That's the last time we joust in Radio Flyer wagons after margarita night.

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(925): View more from California

So I've only had a mustache for about 5 minutes and I'm already pretty sure it's the best decision I've ever made.

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(956): View more from Texas

is there a reason why there is cup of piss in the fridge?

(210): View more from Texas

no

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(405): View more from Oklahoma

New Jersey isn't a real state, it's just a myth you tell little kids to scare them like Canada or Carrot Top

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(559): View more from California

So I heard you only slept with me because you were drunk...is that true?

(1-559): View more from California

That depends on who this is.

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(225): View more from Louisiana

Just desperately used the "it's a boy" cigar I saved from my\nnephews birth to roll a blunt

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(563): View more from Iowa

Your favorite bartender is back from prision

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