Texts From Last Night · DaniShmani's Favorites

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DaniShmani's Favorites Texts:

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(+44): View more from United Kingdom

She kept pulling joints out of her bra and asking strangers for birthday hugs.

Fav 10 1792 717
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(360): View more from Washington

The van in front of me contains people having SEX. I am in full view of a SEX VAN.

Fav 14 2824 835
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(770): View more from Georgia

Nothing gets you judged faster than having cum in your hair at the gas station.

Fav 7 1421 1066
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(512): View more from Texas

I flashed a party boat full of Asians yesterday, didn't I?

Fav 7 1849 742
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(614): View more from Ohio

The cute guy in my class hurt himself and is on crutches. My first thought was "Good. He'll be easier to take down." Like he's a gazelle and I'm a dick tiger. What's wrong with me?

Fav 16 4236 922
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(805): View more from California

WHY IS MY CAR MISSING A DOOR YOU BITCH

(1-805): View more from California

budget cuts

(805): View more from California

YOU CANT BLAME EVERYTHING YOU DO WHILE DRUNK ON BUDGET CUTS

(1-805): View more from California

budget cuts are serious business

Fav 14 4451 1317
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(213): View more from California

Come over. I'll eat you out and we'll make bacon.

(1-213): View more from California

best text I've received ever.

Fav 16 5351 1143
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(606): View more from Kentucky

I think making out with someone could be the cure to all my problems. That or more cowbell.

Fav 14 2844 904
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