dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
College reaches a new low. We just carved a shot glass out of a potatoe.
He should be on Bizare Foods after who he ate last night
I just saw what sperm look like swimming around. I'm not happy with what you've put in my stomach.
I can't decide if the sex was so good I couldn't move, or if it was me being loaded on all the morphine that they shot me up with at the ER.
Homeboy was juggling while taking bong rips. Of course he got laid.
Sorry about giving you those ripped gym shorts after my dog ate your pants, but after the awkard BJ incident I didn't plan on hearing from you again
Woke up covered in green glitter and beer. I am never leaving Ireland.
listen. he fixes things. buys me drinks and sticks his penis in my vagina. age means nothing at this low point in my life.
He handcuffed himself to the keg... D is hooking up with him anyway.
My phone just put together a highlight reel of yesterday's dick pic session, set to music and everything
So we are in the middle of sex and his brother knocks on the door and says "dude I just wanted to know if you want to see the fish I got tonight"
THE STRIPPER HAD A GUN JOHN!
Great, now even dream!me is a drunken borderline mess.
No problem...what are friends for if they can't rub eachothers genitals.
Randomize
