i would punch a child for taco bell
I wish my mouth had a period so that could be my excuse on those days I don't feel like giving head
those 9 inches of man changed my life forever.
At least we kept it together. It's people like him who yell at bushes that give acid a bad name
She gives pretty bad head, but when it's in her dad's Lexus SUV it's tough to complain.
There is a guy dressed as Captain America in the theatre. I want to make out with him even though I have no idea what he looks like. Wish me luck, I'm going in.
I'm riding shot gun after Shawn took a dump in a happy meal box because we were making record time.
She liked to slap me in the face while she was on top. All I can say is that big boobs can excuse a lot.
I would of joined had I not blacked out last night and ran around naked breaking things till 4 am
You're dick is like the main character. It needs its own picture.
There is a Victoria's Secret pageant on right now with Taylor Swift singing in lingerie. I didn't know a penis could get this erect.
We have hung out 5 times and only had sex 3 of those times. I'd call that friendship
If I die it's either cuz I undercooked my burger or because I used questionable cheese. I have no pants on, so if there's a wellness check, you go in first.
I started carrying sissors in my purse to open plan B with. Both ashamed and proud.
Going through his web history. 10 hours ago he searched "how to put on condom with your teeth" I think I'm getting it tonight.
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