Dude I'm telling you, conditioner is the best for jerking it in the shower. It feels great and afterwards everything is all smooth
The album was titled "Best Night Ever" until she found out she was preggers and switched it to "God Punishes Sluts"
Are you still giving blowjobs?
Who is this?
Come outside. The vendor wants to go out strong tonight! Russian hooker interviews. Don't ask. We leave in 3 minutes.
Just break the ice by asking who had to take plan b this past semester
I thought he wouldn't talk to me again. You know, what's that saying "why buy the cow when you can fuck it six hours after meeting"
I just sent you a google doc listing all the reasons why I should stop hooking up with him. Feel free to add to it.
I realize it truly is impossible to burrow under the grass like a mole. Let's not drink for at least another 3 days.
Nope, can't do it. It's a snowball effect. Today, leggings as pants. Tomorrow, female hitler. Natural progression.
I was just the victim of a drive by judging in a horse and buggy.
The fuck? Where?
St. Mary's. Amish people. Too high for this.
Are u alive? If u are, you deserve an award.
you made the house rule that every time you'd say "yay" everyone had to drink.
that explains so much
Yeah come over whenever. Weed gets here at 8.
I'll be there at 7:59.
I don’t want to brag, but vows, morals and will power are no match for my blow job skills
There’s so much sex at the hospital I’m beginning to think scrubs were invented to make duty booty easier
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