Currently having a discussion about how bad cheating is with the girl im dating and the girl im fucking. This might be a sign that i need to reassess my life
You finger a girl once and she thinks she loves you. I'm going back to boys. Lesbians are needy.
just found a beer in my hamper. even my laundry is a dirty alcoholic.
Hey guys, just to let you know, I have a boyfriend...so that hookup was kind of a one time thing.
was that a mass text??
I only have two new blunt burns this year as opposed to freshman year's 6. This is growing up.
Drinking wine out of an empty soup can and watching spongebob squarepants.. I eveb hate myself
I just saw the list where the U.S. doesn't even rank in the top 10 in drinking countries. I know its Tuesday but....its for America
i know and i thought i was only capable of loving dick and drugs, im so happy
Power hour was a bad idea. It turned into power 4 hours, then power puke. Then power sleep till 3.
I'm confused are we getting high or did someone actually die?
The chick working the drive through at BK on New Years stuck her head out the window and told me there were no line ups for the bathrooms inside so i should go in there. I just kept squatting and peeing and told her it would prob help business.
I have fireworks and redbull; let's make heart attack inducing magic happen.
Just to let you know... If you ever want to get me a gift, the One Direction perfume comes out soon....... It's called Our Moment. It's an appropriate gift for a 25 year old woman.
I think the worst was the guy who sent me YouTube videos about how age doesn't matter, and then a link for natural breast enhancements. Kill me.
Finally met a man who appreciates my beer pong skills, definitely a keeper for the weekend
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