then for some reason i googled "how much to buy a cannon"
The football player sitting in front of me just googled himself. Only 4 articles came up. That's why he plays at Utah State.
They'd unbutton the overalls with their lesbian-tongues. It wouldn't even be a problem.
Apparently I took one a huge picture off the wall at the bar and was walking around dancing with it..
You said that you were drinking out of a pan, and then went on to apologise to 'Jesus and all the other guys' for drinking on a Sunday.
I just saw a herd of slutty loofahs run down the street...
I know, I know. But we've discussed my friends and appropriate social behaviour, and I'm pretty sure topless karaoke was a no-no.
Hey, so, you were my "one phone call" last night... Thanks for not picking up. See, this is why I never call you.
We peed on campus in the middle of the tailgate and then hit on a married cop that asked you to stop touching him
you don't understand it took me an hour and a half to escape that bed, I had to memorize his sleeping patterns.
I almost accidentally threw him out a window during sex last night.
I promised her before I left that I'd make good choices and then got drunk and fucked my best friend and her boyfriend.
Well Jon got a DUI sleeping in the back seat so I thought the trunk was safer. BUT WHO CARES WHY JUSE PLEASE COME LET ME OUT!
Do you just want me to shit in a Jack-o-latern
Why are there naked heterosexuals in my apartment?
Randomize
