There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
It's 10am, I'm at grocery store buying booze b/c the bf just told me that he didn't "technically" break up with his ex.
just took batteries out of my vibrator to play wii guitar hero. think i am gonna regret that move later tonight.
This frat boy drinking a forty and wearing a pussy patrol shirt just ran out in front of my car. I should have used less brakes.
I hit a bug from across the room with my flip flop boomerang style. That awesome.
it's my sixth sense. If there's an orgy within 20 miles of me i'll know about if. Or be a part of it.
I think he's in need of mouth to penis resuscitation. Which I happen to be certified
THIS IS THE EMERGENCY BOOZE SYSTEM. I AM EN ROUTE TO DEWITT WITH A FIFTH OF TEQUILA. THIS IS NOT A TEST
They make twin pack pregnancy tests for girls like us
The hardest part about being a child of divorce is when you're at your dad's house but your condoms are at your mom's house.
what better to celebrate not being pregnant than to eat a bowl full of rum soaked pineapples?
THIS THING HATES MY LIVER
Let go out that Thursday night!
Yess sounds good, I have to go turn myself in the next day because what happened last Friday.
Honestly no idea how dad figured out i did all that gay porn unless he was looking at gay porn.
Dude someone puked in a bowl n put it in the fridge. I thought it was salsa! Who does that?
Randomize
