Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
Life lesson: when driving and throwing up, choose a paper bag over plastic. Fuck my life.
hey got me stoned for the first time when i was 14. there is no bond stronger
ok, she started talking about how she swears her step dad killed her mom. starting to back out of this one
Unlimited sex for unlimited netflix. I can deal with that. I think this is the first prostitution deal for netflix ever.
She fuckin peed on me
Stay golden ponyboy
Your CAR. Is in a LAKE. I'd say "a big mess" is a pretty conservative description of the situation.
You are a magnificent human being. I love you from head to toe. This wine is DELICIOUS.
You gotta buy me dinner first. Or smoke me out. Both are equally chivalrous
Based on your 5AM twitter activity I gather you found MORE FREE COKE??
Fuck you, if it wasn't for us going to the city, she would be using me as a human sex toy all day.
I can't wash the smell of tacos off my hands. I feel like the Lady Macbeth of Chipotle.
I assume you passed out however I'm drinking jäger and beer in bed with my cat so your friendship world have been appreciated
I mean you can one up her. Instead of ruining friendships you can ruin marriages.
I’m a little confused...we were told by Cheeto Jesus and his minions multiple times that we would stop hearing about coronavirus the day after the election and, yet, I am still hearing about coronavirus. Is it possible they lied to us again?!?
Randomize
