We traveled between two mile markers in 18 seconds. Do the math.
Heybabeimwearingurpanties
Im bringing wine tonight. Its from a merlot from nashville. i bet it'll taste like infidelity and teenage pregnancy.
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
thats the coolest thing thats happened to my vagina since i dated that guy from portugal.
I think I dropped my cock ring in your back yard
Guess the answer to the last 2 texts right and you'll get a boob shot tonight. Guess wrong and it will be a picture of a used, boogery kleenex.
i think he spiked my sandwich with a viagra
I just did a drunk experiment to find out what it looks like when you turn a burner on the stove on while wearing night-vision goggles. I may be blind in my right eye now.
I feel very compelled to cut off the person's ears that is sitting in front of me
I have nothing to say other than the obvious 'we probably shouldn't have done that' and the less obvious 'i think you bruised my labia major' ...?
My vibrator box just fell off the table and hit my cat in the head, he is a little stunned. Good thing I went medium size
I tried to avoid catching feelings but then he took me out to breakfast
He kept saying "Welcome to Indianapolis" over and over while we were having sex...because that's his hometown. I was scared and confused... I didn't know if I should have said thank you or what.
its 4am. iam sitting in the luggage car of the train eating beef jerkey. i feel like a hobo.
dont insult. no hobo is as pathetic as you.
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