I feel like ignoring a facebook event is a lot like a pocket-veto. The only difference is instead of opposing legislation, I don't want to go to your sketchy party.
How are you going to be there by 9am?
Relax I always go to these conferences hung over
You say that like it's a positive quality
My RA just gave me tips on how to have discreet shower sex. Were we that loud?
She agreed that we could have sex whenever I wanted and I could let someone else meet my mom.
The good news is the bleeding stopped. I think I'm going to sober up before I tell you the bad news though.
I waited so long to accept his friend request that he canceled it. So I added him and when he accepted I deleted him. I wonder how long this will be funny to me
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
Maybe not, but you have to admit watching him get hit by the car was gratifying
Boys should be on-demand - like, once you select one, he's yours for the next 24-hours
My vag is like the Sahara
Ew that's gross.
The sad truth. Barren and empty.
Yo. What's your name again? You put "don't tell your landlord" as your name lol
They had like literally all the dildos. It looked like a seance for dick. I left the apartment and haven't been back.
it was a hallmark card with butt plugs.
I was walking out of the bar when he said I'll see you later and I said I'll see you in my dreams and then fell face first and broke my nose
That confirms what we've all known all along. I'm a bad gay. I have no fashion sense.
Randomize
