My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
I feel like I am becoming dumber sitting here in class than I would be sitting on the couch smoking weed.
I feel violated. a guy just did an ultrasound on my balls. He made eye contact..
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
That reminds me...we need to get swords
I was cleaning out my bag and I found some xanax wrapped in plastic with a note that said "use in case of emergency"
time for a it's-monday-night-and-this-week-is-gunna-suck-drink.
I just saw a group of 50+ year old women all wearing shirts that said "drink up, bitches" ...please tell me that can be us some day.
you can't tell me you didn't shit your pants I saw them in the trash can by the bathroom.
He ordered three small pizzas while I was giving him head.
Um ... did I have a lizard on my shoulder last night at the bar?
He started tongueing his parfait and told "thats what I'd to your ass" in the middle of Starbucks. Of course i brought him home
I hope April is a better month for dicks. March has been very disappointing.
Haha just talked to the dude you bit on Thursday. He has been growing a beard to hide the bruising....
Randomize
