I think my plan to not drink this week was just ruined by my mothers discovery of the chat function on facebook
i'm using my hot pot to make jello shots in a muffin tin. i'm never ever graduating.
The bouncer was kicking me out and I put up my finger for him to wait while I chugged the rest of my drink..all he could say is "are you serious right now?"
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
i didnt think "maybe you should take over" was a good thing to say when i couldnt get it up
just found out they live across the street from coke dealers... rethinking the new years resolution
Just watched my roommate stuff a sandwich in his pocket because we're out of paper plates.
My goal is to not catch on fire... But if i have to dance im going to dance regardless of the danger
The other guys kept waking up so I hid... Like, dick in mouth, hiding in his sleeping bag
Well if you don't want to be kicked out before last call don't I would suggest stop drinking whiskey and don't call the giant bouncer with the neck tattoo "princess"
She is dumping me if she doesn't get a ring by Valentines. So one more month of free sex and it will be back to the right hand.
She took me into the bathroom and force fed me a panini, it was pretty good.
I just took like 30 condoms from the doctors office... no one can say I don't try to save my money.
How do I word.. " hey, I need you to fuck me really hard and see if you or I can feel my birth control. No worries, this is just an experiment." In a nice way without them feeling used.
Last night I realized my life is an experiment of really bad decisions when I had to leave without my underwear. But at least I'm expanding my life experience.
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