Anal astronaut?
Wow word travels fast.
Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
It's gotten to the point where NOT peeing in the sink feels strange and uncomfortable.
One blow job doesn not make me gay.
His IQ is so high, I swear I started ovulating when he told me the number.
As she was leaving she said "You have an awesome penis, I hope to use it again soon" I need that on a business card to hand out at the bar
Last night was the first and hopefully last night I will ever sleep in a hotel bath tub. Sober mind you.
I'm not even gonna ask.
Oh my fucking god you idiot bitch just get here forget about the vodka the fucking cops are looking for you
No seriously, I don't care if you just sucked God's dick. I have had a better Fat Tuesday than you
I just want to have sex that doesn't end like a B-rated horror movie.
and then you two started interpretive dancing to Mozart
Pretty much all i've had today is sugar and orgasms
"Because this is an ongoing legal matter" is how his morning after sex text began. So...
i just remember singing the theme song from 2 and 1/2 men to my hair
I'm not sure what happened. There's a frozen waffle in the floor and he's walking around with a curtain rod and making planes out of bread slices...
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