whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
It looked like if robin williams had a vagina
After 4 hours of foreplay he passed out and almost immediately peed in my bed. Naked. Like a fountain. Then tried to deny it in the morning by saying he just sweats a lot.
i just assumed he broke up with her because she wasn't a freshman anymore
Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
i was just texting to let you know that my facebook chat is working again so you can talk to me more. please talk to me more.
eww mummy girl is here...
what the fuckk. i just want to hold her down, wax her eyebrows, and give her some morals.
New game: find the sober person in Tbell
Drunk sex destroyed my coffee table... ikea this weekend?
If life deals in absolutes, the in betweens are the most hairy.... Fortune cookie wisdom from a stoned Megan.
Seriously, I want to give you a plaque thanking you for your dedicated service to my vagina.
I just spent 20 minutes in a Subway trying to take a candid photo of the doppleganger of the guy I lost my virginity to instead of eating. That's all the evidence I need that my life is on track.
If you think I'm not petty enough to drive to your house at 3 in the goddamn morning just to punch you, you underestimate me.
i have a strong feeling that today will be a naked day for me...i don't feel like doing shit
Who the abstract fuck do you think you are!?
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