I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
happy early fathers day!!!
im not a father
about that...
My dad hugged me and said I love u. I'm glad I didn't pull out that night.
The only pictures he has from one of the biggest football weekends is an album titled "I miss my dog" filled with tons of pictures of his dog and him. This relationship must end.
you told me to make out with him to promote the social success of the sorority
Ok, maybe I don't want to know what happened last night... But somehow I guess I moved the oven.
remember when I told you about my grandma asking me about my sex scars? Less comfortable than that
animal crackers drenched in taco bell mild sauce... surprisingly delightful
breakfast of champions
breakfast of stoners
Fuck underwear. Let's get stoned and eat ravioli.
Sometimes you've gotta crawl to stay concious
I just let my boss bend me over his desk and spank me. I think that is some sort of American dream.
When he pulled out it sounded like a balloon deflating
If you wear a peguin suit you MUST send me a picture!!!
FIVE TIMES AND I HAVENT GOTTEN OFF ONCE
literally yelled NOOOO right before he finished .. yelled “five times and I still haven’t gotten off” when he was still inside me ..
Said “don’t worry I’ll get myself off tomorrow” to top it all off
tell me about the fingering
Randomize
