Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
he literally just asked me which v neck he should wear tomorrow.
That's a really weird place to spoon. Especially if there are more accessible places to spoon. Like a bathtub.
hold on, were in the kitchen painting a yellow brick road to my vagina on my leg with black light paint.
If anyone ask I'm rushing for brotherhood, not so that this bartender will suck my dick
After I finished inserting the catheter he said he thought my name was familiar. Didn't have the nerve to tell him he was my fifth grade teacher.
I just made SCOTCHSICLES. no further info is necessary
I can't wait til I'm a real grown up and am no longer expected to take 7 shots of raspberry ruby as a pregame to a night of drinking natty lite
apparently I got pissed off that no one would let me spray them with a bottle of champagne at midnight of the new year. so I sprayed myself with one shirtless in the near freezing cold outside
Its just akward. Everytime he tells me he loves me, I have to respond with, I love having sex with you. and he just stares at me in amazement
If he flies out here I will sleep with him. I have morals, but not when it comes to southern accents
LACE UP YOUR GODDAMN SHOES
N O
Adulthood is putting your bongs in the dishwasher because you're too lazy to clean them manually.
Are you ok dude?
I need you to know I’m weirdly very sexually attracted to Charlie Puth now
Randomize
