WAKE UP. GET ME THE PILL. AND SAVE MY LIFE
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
where'd the toddler underneathe the beer pong table come from?
I ended up giving him head, i think it was mostly a defensive move so that he wouldn't discover i was wearing those onesy spanx
porn star boner night. come get it.
Half of elefante. Gelafin galaxy
if I die on the way please explain to my mother that I do not wear fishnets on a regular basis
Someone at all my grapes... if it was you or one of your hoodrat friends I swear to god I'll shit in your shampoo
By the way. I expect to test the theory of you running a mile drunk for memorial day.
The dude at Coffee Bean just handed me my tea latte and whispered, "pomegranate blueberry is such a sexy flavor". With a wink. I'm almost certain that there's an STD floating around in my drink.
Sex followed by chicken and waffles... Hands down my favorite morning plans. Count me in.
When she tells her friend, "hey I'll be back tomorrow, just going to fuck a guy", right in front of you, you know you've got a winner.
went out last night. woke up with a lisp.
He made a deal with his real estate agent called fucking in 50 properties for sale
went out to hit golf balls, ended up doing splits at the bar. you're a bad influence.
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