Is it normal that I have to take off my pants to get mouth stitches removed?
I was about to go down on her and her dong flopped out and hit me in the chin. This may have a Nam like post-traumatic-stress-disorder effect on me.
u know whats better than using ur vibrator? using it w/ jeopardy on in the background and half moaning the correct final jeopardy question. yeah that just happened.
what happened last night?
u kept telling him to fuck u optimus prime style
that explains why his roommate kept saying autobots roll out this morning as i left
On the way home from Florida I threw up at the beginning border and ending border of 6 states. You win this year Spring Break.
she just threw a smoke bomb in an elevator and ran down 9 flights of stairs to see it at the bottom.
he's like a stage 5 clinger and he won't even fuck me. he has to be gay. my personality isn't really THAT great.
I walked into his room and he was naked with a half eaten pecan pie and a bottle of wine.
woke up this morning with a big mac and chips on a plate, coke in a glass and a knife and fork AND NAPKIN waiting for me in front of my computer. PORN WAS ALREADY PLAYING. I LOVE DRUNK ME
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
At tuba camp, the pickings are slim. It's like being the tallest midget.
Yeah i just finished watching someone play ping pong with his penis it didn't fully register until after a few seconds
I want falafel more than sex right now. That's really saying something for me...
I didn't even know his name until he texted me the next day and told me I should take a plan B pill. Thanks Danny.
its like i just tried to scrub the hangover off of me.
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