From behind she looks like Richard Simmons
i woke up to him dangling his cock in front of my face
Apparently he always goes for the wrong girl so it should be easy for me to nail him.
I briefly wondered why they weren't in school, but after the tinier one shouted "check out dem titties!" I had my answer
for future reference mormans are hard to crack but they give fucking amazing hand jobs.
Someone else needs to become the bad example in our group
But you wear shame so well
She ended up puking in the bathroom. But she's a good drunk... i told her to stay in there so i could dance til the club closed. She was still in the stall an hour later.
Rule travel - in 2s or put an ankle monitor on me, and maybe a shock collar.
Lemme put it this way babe, at point you were naked in Target.
Where were you?
Laughing
Can we smoke pot out of a menorah?
The dominoes guy came back thirty mins later to ask me out. I guess he figures if I'm eating pizza alone I must have gotten dumped
COKE WAS NOT ON THE ITINERARY FOR TONIGHT.
this is gentle reminder #1 not to forget to bring the vibrator when you come
I'll accept that I'm a woo girl. Just not the drunk cowboy hat wearing bar mongering twat bag type
Took my nervous poop earlier then expected it's gonna be a good day
Randomize
