at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
but the lizard people decide everything anyway
70 feet underwater and I sharted my wetsuit, Tide pen won't clean this up.
That's the last time I try to be adventurous at a gas station
that knocking you heard last night......that was her head slowly going through the wall
We are gonna be 90 years old in wheelchairs at the nursing home sitting at computers poking each other and waiting for the other to die so we will have the last facebook poke.
today's workout consisted of me putting my fake in my sports bra and running to the liquor store.
we aren't going to have kids. there's a 50% chance that they would look like him. not worth the risk
I suggest absurd amounts of masturbation this weekend to build up the necessary calluses
He looked at me like he knew me, and I looked at him like I had seen his penis before.
I don't know if trying Molly for the first time before my flight was an awesome or aweful idea
Stormed out of the house in frustration and now I'm in public and have to take a rage dump. Today sucks.
Is there one of me peeing? If so do I look bangable in it
I'm recreating the you're a wizard harry video with a guy on snapchat whilst having snapchat sex with another... Adulting is fun
If you are refering to the duckling living in your bath...I can explain, but before I do, can you throw a peice of bread in there?
Randomize
