The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
I texted him about a book we both like. I was expecting a "ya great book... let's bone" response. It didn't work
I proposed and she said yes man.
You realize the irony of surrendering on independence day, right?
The bartender let me pay my bar tab with my itunes giftcards.
No need to clean the puke on the driveway. The squirrel is eating it up.
I may only be a second year med student but I feel very confident in calling that a micropenis.
this is your 3rd pregnancy scare in 2 years, I think its time for you to re-evaluate the whole 'im a lesbian' thing
I have officially made out with every girl you've made out with, even the random you met on the Mexico flight
Texas State Troopers call you ma'am even when they arrest you for public nudity and after you've puked on their cruiser. Country boys raised right.
I woke up in a bunk bed beside two Brazilians dude you have no idea how happy I was
I may or may not be setting up an encounter with a foot fetishist just because I'm curious.
Some dude just said my hair smells like his pillows
That moment when your mom is so drunk she makes you get out of bed to lay in her bed because she thinks it feels like sleeping on a marshmallow peep....
My conscious state is steadily increasing towards drunkenness.
Hey man, he's too drunk to remember what you said. What drugs are we buying and when should we expect them?
Randomize
