Im bringing wine tonight. Its from a merlot from nashville. i bet it'll taste like infidelity and teenage pregnancy.
Maybe i should go to church more so i can meet girls like in that song, you know, the ones that act slutty on every day but sunday...
ah, so the catholic church. i gotcha
Umm went to talk to a client ended up seeing his semi erect penis. This is my life.
I hate how you keep a running list of people who have seen me naked.
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
Apparently I spent my 300 dollar tax return by ordering ramen on amazon last night. Please tell me this will somehow pay off in the long run.
I'll give you $10 to get a dick pic with a gecko on it.
I just bought us acid. I'm like the drug tooth fairy. Get ready to wake up with a sweattart of acid under your pillow.
Dad's teaching me to make moonshine this weekend as "college prep". How scared should I be sis?
! asked the random counter guy from 7/11 for Percocet. he immediately called his hookup
there may have been a blood oath never to speak of it again...only reason i can think of as to why there was a 1 inch bloody cut on my right boob
It was a mess. I sat on the kitchen floor with maple whiskey and cried into a bowl of poutine. I've never even been to canada
I can't even spell what he said he was on. And I had to call 4 people before someone had heard of it.
He went down on me to the national anthem being sung by Jordan sparks. It was very patriotic of him
Stay positive! You think people like sad vaginas? NO! You'll get some!
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