Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
it went kinda like vodka, childhood memories, screaming/cursing, fist fight, tears, broken shit, passing out. in that order. tis the season.
And then i made him answer questions about me before i took off my clothes
her name was charlotte except you kept calling her chatroulette and yelling at her to show you her boobs
They asked me to help them shop for lingerie.
Tell them everything looks awful, makes their ass look fat, etc. You'll wreck their self esteem and likely both have sex with you to make themselves feel better.
You're the most understanding sister I could ever ask for.
well he has a gf so if he picks me up tonight i'll only him finger me
No, she passed out instead. I have the worst luck, its like Jesus is mad at me for having the same birthday as him
I'm so disappointed in myself I can actually taste it.
Does it taste like semen?
Kate gave me a 3 day old cup of tequila last night and forced me to chug it. P.s. i drew u a picture
I woke up naked in his kitchen...His name is Mike and we're having a "what happened last night" beer.
I just wanna get drunk and go sledding in my kayak
I am so sorry. Not sure for what, but whatever I did last night probably merits an apology, so I'm covering my bases.
You have not lived until you've slid down a waterfall fucked out of your mind. Fact.
You came in, yelled 'i am from the future' then puked all over the floor
Shit day. Some kids decided to open my car at 3 AM while I was at work and the alarm went off. I went after them with a sword but they were minors so I didn't kill them.
Randomize
