you want me
i'd rather choke on a dick.
We should be called the Road Head Warriors
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
Were not really friends so much as I suck his dick a lot
The lady at the touchless car wash just gave me the look of death. How do I say, "sorry it's not my puke" in Spanish?
You know you had good weekend wheb we you hook up with three different girls and you don't feel no pain when u pee in the morning
she was pooping while we were on video chat. new level of love.
Do you think it'd be inappropriate to have an I'm Not Keeping My Baby Party the day after her baby shower?
I don't fucking care about the convenience of not having freudian slips. I spent 2009-2011 screwing around with 3 different Daniels. 2012 WILL be the dawn of a new day
How about a mike?
Already had two of those
And is it bad that I haven't talked to guys who I haven't already dated? I feel like a recycle bin.
I'm going to smoke the pathetic stems and miscellaneous particles that weren't good enough for all my other bowls because its all I have left. This is my bag's Rudy moment.
Abort mission; I repeat: Abort mission.I found an attractive one.
THIS IS SO HOT. BYE PANTIES.
WE ARE DOING DRUGS AND GOING TO THE STRIP CLUB SATURDAY LADIES
i'm pretty sure my brother is still drunk from last night. he's telling my parents that humans are at the top of the food chain for a reason and listing off all the exotic animals he would eat
Randomize
