my boyfriend just named your boyfriend's penis.
well apparently i yelled MY VAGINA WAS ANNIHILATED and his whole family heard
He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
I need to stop researching the drugs I do on Wikipedia. The parts about abuse and dependency hit too close to home
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
fuck. I just remembered I agreed to let you finger me last night for solely for "scientific purposes"
you fucked my boyfriend. margarita girls night will not fix this.
Plus you know he's just 2 semesters and 4 glasses of wine away from "experimenting" with some French major
He's holding a pee stick. Yes it's weird.
I almost put an adult beverage in my sippy cup for the beach but realized the next step would be rehab.
No the next step is being buzzed at the beach. I would've.
he apologises profusely for spelling mistakes in his texts but doesn't care about cheating on me. priorities
But I did discover that he's totally okay with going down on me while I eat taco bell so that's a plus, right?
I'm sorry that you wanted to get laid and I all I did was play with your new cat instead.
Turns out dignity is priceless and Plan B costs $41.09
Remember that gum I swallowed 3 days ago? I just threw it up.... whole.
Randomize
