I just ate 10 fun sized 3 musakteers.. I'm pretty sure I'm about to start my period.
Talk to you next week
After work we went home to fool around. Turns out he had sawdust under his foreskin. I'm never going down on him again.
hes so high that he's convinced hes a duck. hes squating in the bathtub quacking. that was NOT JUST pot.
Just went through ex bf's and hook up buddys and liked pictures of them on facebook. A friendly reminder that I will be back in for the holidays
He sent me a pic and IT CURVED OUT OF THE PICTURE! Curved. Out. Of. The. Picture.
So I think his penis grew over the weekend. Is that possible or does absence make the dick grow longer?
When I come over I'm bringing "Socky" the Alcoholism Prevention puppet, today he is going to tell you boys about his FAVORITE word---its called "moderation"
Just started taking liver support pills. Welcome to Senior year.
PA to anyone at the party last night and wondering where your pants are: they are in my backyard.
I just think his face would be more attractiveif it was framed by my thighs
Today is all about not throwing up, where the fuck are my keys and does anyone know what happened to that guy in the panda suit my roommate had sex with last night.
Being in the club with your moms drunk friends > having a healthy relationship with your mom
Surprise court date day!!! Wake the fuck up!
When your job has killed your spirit to the point that you don't want to flirt with the cute, tall guy at Enterprise
GIRL PLEASE. GO BACK AND POP THE TITTY OUT
She always used to joke about becoming a stripper. WHO'S FUNNY NOW?!
Randomize
