hey can i ask you a kinda weird question?
i know what the question is. yes they are bigger, and no i did not get plastic surgery
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
Did you just see the Batmobile???
I gave them both handjobs at the same time. Felt like I was skiing
he conducted the entire waffle house into singing the song Oklahoma. He was wasted.
There are not one, but two women wearing my boxers on the couch right now. You need to wake the fuck up.
hey as creepy as this sounds i still have your eyelashes on my desk
dude. we need more in our fridge then just beer and applesauce.
An accidental pregnancy to a guy with a trustfund is no mistake. It is a gift from god.
I'm not sure whom I'm texting but I put you in my phone as last nights fuck budy, and I'm just curious if I left my clutch with you?
There is a doctor sitting next to me at lunch talking about the engorged scrotum surgery he did this morning and I am about to lose my professional grown adult facade.
Come over. But instead of sex, will you rub anti itch cream all over my face?
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
What's life without a pregnancy scare?
We need a kiddie pool and lots of cornstarch
Randomize
