Ok Hollywood, I get it. Megan Fox is hot. Now she is in a movie where she is so hot that dudes just fucking die. Great.
Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
don't blame me for your drunken lack of judgement
big words... still drunk. dont care. your fault.
I want you to tape your fingers together and give me a lobster claw hand job.
My dry heaving is complicating my ability to speak.
Ya. I wonder how much being a beard for a major league baseball player pays. This could be a lucrative arrangement...
there is nothing worst than getting kicked in the face by a stripper
Just woke up with an eye that wont open, a half eaten piece of pizza on my chest and a raging boner.
That's the last time I get in a car with six rappers headed to god knows where.
Drugs are gluten free tho, right?
We were ushered out of Medieval Times by a squire for making out in the torture chamber. Children were present.
HIS DICK ISNT BIG ENOUGH FOR HIM TO BE THAT PROUD OKAY
They forgot my ranch. They're dead to me.
We're both fucking guys named Frank. Our friendship was meant to be.
You kept saying, "please sir, can I have some more."
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